Sweetly Broken (title from Jeremy Riddle’s song)

Questions are popping up on my mind now that I just feel like releasing them. I guess you will agree with me when I say that some answers to our questions are expected but not convincing or encouraging at all – they are like salt in our wounds. But, well, salt is used for purifying, are we not suppose to rejoice then? Arghh…

I must say, my previous weeks have been very tough (and still getting tougher…) that I just want to disappear for awhile… I’ve asked a lot of things lately but I’ve received the otherwise.

I long to hide and rest but I’m being pushed to come out and run…
I yearn for something but I’m asked to wait.
I’m begging for a helping hand but they even broke my leg.
I wish for a lighter load but I was given more challenges.
I want to shout and yet GOD is asking me to stay calm and quiet.

So, anyone who can give me a very gratifying answer? I bet most of us would say, that includes me (and because there’s no other way), “Trust and rest in HIS arms.” BUT, trusting and resting are not as easy as we thought. It requires a willful mind, heart and soul to totally lay down everything and remove any shadow of doubts. I’ve heard a lot of well known writers/pastors/missionaries who took time (some years) for them to totally grasp how to really rest in the midst of the storm. I believe it’s because the limited mind can’t easily chew something like that. Touch their family and surely, many would be shaken. Throw some more personal/emotional/work concerns and definitely, some would draw back.

My question still remains, are we not supposed to rejoice then? I believe no one can really lay down any crystal clear answers but as most of us know that still, GOD has His own ways of getting our attention. He wants us to get out from our “physical state” and step into HIS “spiritual realm”. Right, our understanding is very limited that’s why He’s asking us to let go of that “limited understanding” and embrace HIS “eternal grace”. I admit rejoicing is very hard during the hard-hitting trials but at the end of it, I’m certain that we will surely rejoice as long as we stay in HIS guidance – that, I’m very certain…

PS: Contemplating on a lot of things this morning when I was reminded of my old blog (I posted elsewhere before) so  I dug it up and decided to post here. This was actually written on 01 August 2008.


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